Tacos and Tiaras

I'm just being all-zen-and-shit

Beginnings

Brain Dump: Thanks, Mommy

Beginnings, Change, Divine Orchestration, Gratitude, Happiness, In Media Res, Kindness, Love, Luceat Lux Vestra, Music, Prayer and Meditation, Reflection, Sacred Rebel

There is a time for many words, and there is also a time for sleep.”

-Homer, The Odyssey

A month has passed flown since my last post. Time is such a weird thing with how it can both drag and fly at the same time, but I guess it’s a good thing that the saying is “Time flies when you’re having fun.” And at the advice of Homer, (see quote above), I’m going to try to make this a short post because it’s almost 2:00 AM. Right, we’ll see. LOL

When I woke up, my Instagram app was still open on my phone, and the post was an image of sheet music with the following: “If you can read this, thank a music teacher.” So many music teachers in my life, but the first was my mom.

At the funeral home when I spoke about my mom, I said that the greatest gift she gave me was that she taught me how to read, not only words but also music, before I even started kindergarten. When I saw the Instagram post about thanking a music teacher, my mom came to mind – she came to mind several times today – and it felt like a nudge to get this out of my head. Or my heart. They’re kind of the same sometimes.

A little more than a year ago, I started playing my ukulele regularly and occasionally posting a video on Facebook or Instagram. Over the past year, by allowing instead of chasing, music overtook writing. (I think I wrote about this in my previous blog post)

In media res. And as timing would have it, my recording of Chasing Cars popped up on my YouTube playlist while I was typing the previous paragraph. The description reads: “23 February 2021 – I haven’t had a lot of time for posting on social media, but I have been playing daily and having fun learning some new tools. This is the base of one project, and special thanks to Paul Hennessee Music for making time to help me learn what I’m trying to accomplish. Thank you to all of my IG ukulele family for inspiration, support, and especially for shining your light through music.”

Sigh… so much more to say, but I scrolled back to update the title and reread Homer’s quote. A N Y W A Y . . .

Dear Mommy,

I missed you a lot today. I had just posted my latest video, Devoted to You, and while I should have been super happy, my heart suddenly felt heavy and I started crying. Maybe it was just the collective energy because of all the things going on in the world, but it’s been a while since that kind of thing happened. I missed having you to cry to, but the one you picked for me was there.

Thank you for everything. you’ve done for me. You encouraged me as a writer, but you nurtured me as a musician. And in any case, you wanted your children to be “good people”. Everyday I feel grateful for so many things, and it doesn’t escape me that much of it is because of you. Because you’re my mom.

I receive so much kindness in the feedback on my videos, but the most meaningful are the ones that aren’t about the music but my mission and purpose that comes from my smile or light or energy. This past year has been a lovely adventure, and truly “I bless the day I found” my Beau. Believe me, I get it, why you picked him – our devotion to each other, to our mission and purpose, and to the Higher Power. He’s my dream come true AND he’s making some of your dreams for me come true too. Thank you, Mommy. Love and miss you always.

Luceat lux vestra.

Aligning and LIVING My Path

Beginnings, Beyond Tacos, Change, Gratitude, Happiness, In Media Res, Intuition, Leadership, Luceat Lux Vestra, Music, Sacred Rebel, Tacos and Tiaras Site, Warrior Woman Wednesday

I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.”

– Douglas Adams
Screenshot from the MBA Artisan Spotlight on Sunday, 18 July. Grids of Instagram and TikTok. Each grid has my most recent posts on the left and my earliest posts on the right.

The past week (12-18 July) felt like another pivotal point on my path. Almost two years have passed since I launched Tacos and Tiaras blog and social media, and like it is with most transformations, you may not notice while it’s happening. You arrive at a day when you look back and SEE HOW FAR YOU’VE COME instead of how far you still have to go. And honestly, some days I’m still not 100% certain of all the details, but I feel clear on my mission and purpose – LUCEAT LUX VESTRA.

Visually I noticed when I opened my Instagram – all of most recent posts visible on the page looked very uniform AND were in my newest format for creating videos. So I scrolled back to the first posts when I launched in 2019 (see left grid in the pic for this blog post), and what stands out is that the purpose of my Instagram isn’t clear.

I was actually surprised to see my MAKALA dolphin soprano ukulele because at that point, I shared a pic because I obtained a PURPLE ukulele! Posting videos of me playing didn’t cross my mind because I already had a ukulele for a few years and was no further past the beginner stage as I was in 2015. Yeah, my mindset was that no one would want to watch me riding the struggle bus learning to play!

My existing TikTok account sat unused until 19 September 2020. My first TikTok was a song for Talk Like a Pirate Day! I began using it as Tacos and Tiaras instead of personal account, and this opened the door for me to learn another platform as well as making videos instead of simply sharing pictures. If you look at right grid in the pic for this blog post, it’s similar to the Instagram account in that the newest posts look more uniform because I learned to use covers to give the post a title and facilitate the user experience in my catalog. The content also seems more focused whereas my earliest posts seem unclear about my niche. Being all-zen-and-shit and letting my light shine was “my thing” but I was still finding my way to what kind of content would accomplish “my thing”.

I really can’t remember if I have shared this confession in the past two years of this blog, so let me say it now: I used to get stuck in my head. A LOT. What I mean is that I wasn’t just spending a lot of time in thought, but I was thinking instead of living.

I fell victim to my own mind in that I would think things through, believing that I knew that if I completed actions X, Y, and Z, they would lead to a specific outcome. That may not sound like a bad thing if it meant avoiding mistakes, but either way, I wasn’t living if I stayed in my head, and I’ve learned to not only accept but also at times EMBRACE my mistakes.

So here I am… living… making strides… making mistakes… making impressions… making others smile or laugh… making a difference… making memories…

I feel so much gratitude for recognizing the alignment in my life and for knowing that I am fulfilling my mission and purpose with humility and gratitude. Whenever I write my gratitude whether it’s in my journal or as part of setting intentions, I express how grateful I feel that the Universe continues to deliver the experiences, opportunities, tools, resources, and people that are aligned with me, my mission, and my purpose. I feel grateful to the people who whether or not they know it had a role in where I am today, shaping the future – not just my future but also any life I touch by fulfilling my mission and purpose.

Two years ago I started with what I thought I was being called to do – write this blog. I’ve had times of writer’s block when I was chasing a prompt; I’ve had times of daily posts when I was allowing the flow! Somehow in using Instagram and TikTok to be a light (when I moved from posting ukulele videos on Facebook for just my friends to posting on TnT social media), the kind feedback from two of my favorite friends helped me to realize that my laughing and smiling set my videos apart from other music videos. Initially I had put YouTube on the back burner until a few months ago, and it has opened many more doors.

On Sunday, 18 July, I was in the Artisan Spotlight on my YouTube brother’s channel. Roland and I talked beyond the topic of music, and I performed a few songs; but I really enjoyed SPEAKING for a change instead of writing or singing! And I feel so grateful to Roland for inviting me to be his guest because it was an opportunity for me to grow and reach more folks with whom I might not have crossed paths. Whether our conversation inspired others or maybe my singing, smiling, or laughing just added a bright spot to someone’s night, being in the spotlight was another piece of fulfilling my mission.

ANWYAY… when I look at my social media accounts and this blog, I see how they’re a bit disconnected. Over the course of two years, each account went through changes as shown in the pic for this post. It’s time to bring everything together… My YouTube channel has ukuLEENIE on the banner along with tacosandtiaras.com in the image, but I’ve never explained on YouTube what’s the deal with Tacos and Tiaras Tuesday Tunes and why I’m wearing a tiara and an F bomb shirt.

I hope you’re as excited as I am to see what’s about to arrive…and for which I already feel grateful.

Luceat lux vestra.