Rolling the Dice on Love

“Better to put your heart on the line, risk everything, and walk away with nothing than play it safe. Love is a lot of things, but ‘safe’ isn’t one of them.”

– Mandy Hale, The Single Woman: Life, Love, and a Dash of Sass

Rolling the dice. Literally and figuratively. What part is chances? What part is risks?

This morning I was reflecting on a conversation from yesterday with a friend who is living with cancer. It’s been nearly two weeks since another friend died. She kept her battle with cancer quiet, and I know she would have said the same things.

Why is it that sometimes we wait for terminal illness to pay attention to what matters? When it’s always been there.

Is it because the future days are less than the ones that have passed? Is it because we look back and finally learn lessons that we need to pack into a short time?

And it sucks that I’ve had too many opportunities to have “before you’re gone” conversations with friends and family before I lose my chance at receiving their wisdom.

Why do we behave differently when we know an inevitable end is sooner than we’d like? When one’s life could end unexpectedly tomorrow… or even today…

I asked my friend for advice on something that’s been on my heart and mind, and my gut just feels like it’s pulling me in a scary direction. But the destination is calm, peace, and completeness.

In addition to his supporting statements, he said:

• “Give it a chance and see how it goes. And always listen to your gut.”
• “You only live once. There will be no do-overs.”
• “You only live once – sometimes you just have to roll the dice and take your chances. This sounds like one of those times.”
• “Sometimes they work. Sometimes they don’t. Roll the dice.”

He preceded his third time saying, “Roll the dice” with telling me I deserve what I want, but if it’s meant to be, then I won’t be able to begin to receive it if I don’t try.

Chances and risks… what are they worth to us?

Taking a chance on love isn’t just romantic love. It’s love between friends. It’s love between parents and children. Why is it we assess the chance or risk of heartbreak when it comes to romance, but we freely choose friendship or parenthood when heartbreak is still a possibility? Maybe it’s because we have more hope in the best outcome of chances and risks. Maybe it’s because we know we are willing to risk it because having that person in our life for even a short time is better than not having them in our life at all.

This morning my son sent me a local news article. One of his friends died yesterday in an accident. Also this morning, one of my sorority sisters is honoring her daughter who would have been 18 years old today but died when she was still a young child. Both of those deaths were unexpected. Dare I say, “premature.”

Have hope. Roll the dice. Life is just too fucking short to miss out on receiving what you want and what you deserve.

Luceat lux vestra.